I know that life is just so full of twists and turns!
One moment, you can be feeling extremely happy
The next, so dead and sad that you detest life
Well, welcome to my life people!
That's pretty much what i experience everyday!
And so far, no one can understand the stress, burden and pressure i'm facing...

Think that my life is perfect? BULLSHIT!
Think my life is carefree? YOU'RE DEAD WRONG!
Think I'm always happy and full of sunshine? THINK AGAIN!

Yesterday was well...another of such a day
1) Biology made me in high spirits!
2) Felt sucky for being a pain in the neck of someone whom i regard closely

I know that i said to you, and well others, to STAY HAPPY!
If you're happy, i'd be happy!
I was the one who told you to not care about my feelings
So i can't fault you...i deserved it
Though the chances of you reading this is slim, i want you to know...
Though this ain't the first time you're seeing this, please read on...

I really want things to be how they were previously
I'm really trying...
Whatever you request, i try my best to fulfill them...
I do all this, in hope that you'll see how sincere i am in wanting us to stay strong
I tried my best, hoping that you see the effort i put in to do them
It's just difficult, very difficult...
I knew what i was doing, i wanted to prove myself
But i know that your thinking of me has not changed
And no matter how hard i try, no matter how much i do, no matter how amazing...
If you don't see me in a different light, my effort is futile
Please tell me what I must do so that things will be like how things are previously!
What must i do...

Like you, I hate talking about this...but...
Knowing that we seriously lack understanding of each other
Knowing that you no longer feel comfortable even talking to me
Knowing that we are no longer as close as before
It sucks...a lot
I hate listening to myself say this...cos i'd be asking...WHY?

Seriously, what went wrong?
I really want things to be like how they were last time...
Sorry if I seem weak to you
But imagine if the person you're closest to and trust most is drifting from you and you have no means of stopping it...that's how i'm feeling right now
You might feel that i'm over-reacting
But i'm not, cos you know that you mean a lot to me rightx?
And if you are of such great importance, i will not rest knowing that the situation is on rocks
Please try to understand and see things from my point of view
I don't know if after seeing this, will you hate me or...
But at least i know that i've tried to tell this to you
It's sad that the only thing that i can do, and have been doing, is to pray